mad libs for all! (especially mike, kartik, and adam)

in an effort to get certain delinquent members of this blog to post, i will provide them with an easy-to-format post. ed created a sort of madlib for his work bio. it is amusing when he does it, but i imagine it will be less so when i do it. thus the other contributors to this blog should try their hand.

ed's post:

"So, my name is Ed and I am the Datawaslost intern for the summer. My first duty as such is to write a bio for myself. I thought that instead of just going to the internet and vaguely plagiarizing a sample bio, I would just make a mad libs out of it. Please feel free to use this template for yourself any time.

"I am John Smith, both a loving husband and educator for over 25 years. I decided to become an educator so that I could inspire children to learn, just as my teachers fostered my love of knowledge. My favorite quote is "Knowledge comes, but wisdom lingers." -Tennyson

John Smith received the Teaching Award for Excellence from the Bower Institute for Higher Learning. He is proudest of this award because his students bestowed it upon him. The students must take it upon themselves to write an essay and nominate their favorite teacher. Of all of his thirty different awards, this one is kept in a very special place- his heart."

MAD LIBS

I am (your name), both a (romantic adjective + relationship status) and (occupation) for over (span of time). I decided to become a (occupation) so that I could (sentimental excuse/reason). My favorite quote is "(your favorite quote)." -(The quoted)

(Your name, inexplicably in the second person) received the (best thing you ever got) from (who gave it to you). S/He is proudest of this award because (more sentiment, lay it on). Of all of his/her (type of thing), this one is kept in a very special place- (the most special place you can imagine)."

Now for mine:

I am Ed, both a chronically single man and a student since ever. I decided to become an Intern so that I could put it on my resume. My favorite quote is "Ace! Rock and Roll knows no genders, boundaries or nationalities!" -Guitar Wolf

Ed received two cats from the Chicago Anti-Cruelty Society. Ed is proudest of these cats because they were a steal at only 75$. Of all of the things in his apartment, these cats are kept in a very special place, in his apartment?

Man, I really should have snuck "gazongas" in there somewhere."

my attempt...?...:

I am Nathan, both an occasionally-engaged-in-amusingly-disastrous-relationships-guy and an "Editor" for a legally imperiled technology company. I decided to become an "Editor" so that I could blog for money. My favorite quote is "All plots lead deathward." - DeLillo

Nathan received a diploma from Mary Anne Doane. He is proudest of this diploma because it was not a cheap thing like most of the other things he has gotten. Of all of his diplomas, this one is kept in a very special place - apparently in the place where they emboss diplomas.