I Don't Know

First off, congratulations to Brown University for being all I could ever hope for. Recently, I had complained about how Brown did not resemble the "college" I saw on television where people spend all day screaming "wooooo" with a beer in one hand, a titty in another in a land of wet t-shirts, debauchery, and hormonal excess. This past week, Brown became TV college, literally. Between the SexPowerGod debcale/glory on the O'Reilly factor, the league champion football team, and proliferation of trife by my housemates (being chased by the cops, etc.), I have never been more proud of good ole Brunonia.

That said, I've found a new issue to whine about. There are few things in life that I feel like I do not know the correct answer to. I don't mean, like, knowing how many miles Jupiter is from Saturn. I mean given the basic information, usually available through Google, I can say who's right, who's wrong, what's problematic, why stuff happened, and why people do the things they do. Because of this massive IQ that I have been blessed to carry around, it is very frustrating for me when I cannot figure certain things out. I've surrounded myself with fairly intelligent people to help me in these rare situations but alas, there are certain problems whose answers remain elusive.

The Browns beat the Dolphins 22 to 0. I have absolutely no idea how to feel about this. For those that don't know, I was a Miami Dolphins/Marlins/Panthers fan up until my college but since I've been in Providence I have slowly converted to being a Cleveland Browns/Indians/Barons fan. I mean what makes someone a Browns fan or Dolphins fan anyways. Is it who you happen to root for at the moment or is it something deeper? I mean I've always been a Dolphins backer so its just more comfortable to stay with what I know. This is not to say that I have had success with the Dolphins. Sure, they've been to the playoffs consistently but they haven't made it to the big game in my lifetime. The fact that Marino didn't get a ring is one of the greatest injustices of humanity. How much has this admittedly important omission hurt the career of perhaps the greatest of all time? To be fair though, its been a while since the Dolphins have had any sustained success. They haven't even made the playoffs since I've been in college.

On the other hand, the Browns have been consistently disappointing. I feel like the chances of the Browns even reaching the Super Bowl in my lifetime are slim. Watching Browns fans live their lives in constant depression because they can never win the big one does not seem like the way one should live their life. However, should I even be basing my choice on which team I think has a better chance of success? And do we really have a choice in the matter in the first place? Isn't the rule that you just go for the home team no matter what? I mean we can attempt to deny the home team and look where the grass is greener but then that's just selling yourself out. But then why should I root for a team that I don't think can win? Is it worth the chance? I mean once you switch can you switch back or is that it?

I guess this is the crux of the issue - both teams have been disappointing and the only success I've ever experienced is as a Dolphins fan and since I doubt that either team can succeed, I should probably just stick to what I'm used to. On the other hand, I feel a deeper calling to the Browns since they're the hometown team and thus the more natural choice. I also feel like if/when the Browns win, it will be all that much sweeter than with the Dolphins. After all, I was born a Clevelander - though I don't know that choosing a team is simply a matter of where you were born. In the meantime, I guess I'll just root for both and just find myself lost and confused if they ever go against each other for the AFC championship. Like that'll ever happen...